Waking up to a new reality after major abdominal surgery can feel overwhelming, especially when it comes to reconnecting with your personal style. It’s easy to think about your wardrobe and feel an immediate sense of dread. However, dressing with a stoma does not mean sacrificing your identity: it’s about discovering what makes your body feel safe, supported, and genuinely comfortable.

Navigating the steep learning curve of my first ileostomy

In 2007, when I underwent surgery for my first ileostomy, I felt completely lost. Out of sheer panic and a lack of guidance, I threw away almost my entire wardrobe. I immediately retreated into oversized joggers and baggy boys’ T-shirts because I believed that was my only option moving forward. Back then, I wore my stoma bag over the waistband of my trousers, which limited my clothing choices. Every single top I owned had to be a specific length just to ensure the bottom of the bag did not poke out.

Clothing and body image were not aspects that my stoma nurse had initially mentioned, leaving me to assume that I could not wear anything directly over my stoma. When she later revealed that I could actually tuck my bag under my clothes, high-waisted options were not a standard high-street trend. The lower waistbands of that era sat in an awkward position, causing my bag to stick out at the top: a frustration that led right back to wearing loose, baggy layers. I tried wearing tights over the top, but that just led to more frequent leaks! I felt incredibly uncomfortable with how I looked, so I spent two whole years feeling really unhappy, until I eventually had my stoma reversed.

Finding community and discovering adaptive clothing options

Years later, in 2014, the time came for ileostomy number two. By this point, I knew many other people with IBD and ostomies from online support groups. I connected with an incredible community, and for the first time, I learned about the existence of specialised ostomy underwear, support bands, and tailored waistbands.

It’s worth noting that you can often obtain certain support garments, waistbands, and abdominal support belts on prescription via the NHS, so it’s worth consulting your stoma nurse to find out what you are entitled to. While I explored these adaptive garments, my personal daily routine ended up being quite simple: I relied on tight vest tops layered underneath my clothing during the colder months. When summer arrived, I gravitated towards skater-style dresses paired with soft tights pulled gently over my bag to keep everything secure. This time, it didn’t cause leaks, but bags had improved a lot during the last seven years.

Embracing comfort with standard cotton underwear

By the time my newest stoma was created in 2018, I decided to simplify my approach even more. Instead of purchasing heavily structured ostomy underwear, I returned to high-street basics. While many people absolutely swear by specific adaptive brands, I found that the firm, elasticated waistbands on some speciality underwear felt restrictive. Being relatively short, those waistbands tended to sit in the wrong place on my torso, pulling me in tightly and creating the illusion of tummy rolls where there were none. Other fabrics were simply too thick, making me feel overheated and sweaty.

Instead, my absolute daily saving grace became standard cotton underwear from Marks and Spencer (M&S). Their high-waisted full briefs featuring a soft lace waistband have become my ultimate wardrobe staple. Along with some boy shorts featuring the same high waist and lace combo, which are comfortable all day long. They cover the majority of my stoma bag, keeping it perfectly flat and supported without any digging or rolling. In 2024, high street stores such as M&S and Next introduced stoma underwear lines, but because I am really happy with what I’ve got, I haven’t sampled any.

Finding the right baseline support has completely reopened my wardrobe. I can comfortably wear tight leggings, though I am always mindful that snug clothing requires me to empty my bag slightly more frequently when out and about, since the space inside the bag is compressed. I naturally gravitate towards high-waisted trousers and skirts because they give the pouch plenty of room to expand. Lower waistbands can compress the centre of the bag, which sometimes stops the output from dropping down and causes it to collect at the top: the same applies to tight underwear lines!

Stepping into body confidence and letting go of stigma

At this stage in my journey, my relationship with my body has transformed. I no longer feel the need to hide my pouch away from the world. If my ostomy bag shows over a waistband or through a dress, I am completely at peace with it. The people in my life know it is there, and the opinions of passing strangers do not cross my mind. I view it as an open invitation: if someone asks, I am more than happy to educate them and share my experience, though you might be surprised to learn that no one actually has!

If you are looking to explore specialised garments, the adaptive fashion market has expanded massively. Because my preferred briefs give me total freedom, I’ve not needed to invest heavily in adapted lines, but everyone’s body shape is uniquely beautiful. If you do want to explore purpose-made options, I highly recommend buying just a single piece to test first. It is easy to waste money on a drawer full of items that might not suit your specific torso length or stoma placement.

Specialised ostomy clothing and accessory brands to consider

If you want to explore custom style solutions, here are some excellent companies making incredible waves in the ostomy community:

• CUI wear
• Comfizz
• Vanilla Blush
• Chums
• I Am Denim
• StomaStyle

Ultimately, your wardrobe choices belong completely to you. There is no right or wrong way to dress a stoma: the only rule that truly matters is that you feel completely comfortable, confident, and at home in your skin.